Can't see the couch for the trees
2002-12-09

It's funny, even when you know bad news is coming, it doesn't really make it any easier does it? I knew that the 3D Cad was going to be a problem, in reality the only problem with the other job I was up for. I answered all the other questions over the two hours I was there correctly, but that one... That one hole, I knew was going to be the deal breaker. Still you have hope I guess.

When the phone call came I was perfectly calm and business like. There was none of the nervousness you get in yoru stomach, like the feelign you get when a police car comes up behind you with the lights on or when you realize you've broken some part of your anatomy. I listened, I understood, I handled it well, and when it was all over I thought that I must be getting use to the rejection.

Oh he said lots of nice things about me, and they were good to hear. If I had dad Solid Works experience they would have made me an offer on the spot. My experience was impressive as were my ideas. That was some consolation, no?

I hung up feeling OK. It wasn't till later that this sort of wave of sadness washed in. It was so gradual, like the tide creeping up that I didn't even notice at first. Next thing I knew it was high tide. It didn't help that our basketball team lost to our in state rivals, not a good thing. I over compensated by drinking way alot. I was funny that night very funny. I had everyone else laughing, very much on top of my game. Too bad I knew exactly what was going on... it was like a movie you've already seen and know what the next punch line is going to be. I was dealing in the way I know how. Life goes on.

Yesterday was better... We went out to stalk, hunt and kill a tree for the house. Kind of barbaric, but hey I am man, see me saw. We go to this little family tree farm out in the sticks. Any tree in the place $30. We never tag ahead, we've always been able to find something perfect when we wanted it. This year was no exception.

We got off the beaten path a bit and there it was, the perfect tree. It was a little too big, OK, maybe a lot too big and that made it perfect. We had it cut down, popped it in the truck and brought it home. I had to cut several inches off the bottom. It takes up a fairly large chunk of one end in the living room. It's a nice tree, hell it is a beautiful tree. Probably the best I've ever had. It looks right.

I put out all the ourdoor lights up and M.E. put the lights on the tree. I'm hoping that this jump start will improve my Christmas spirit. It hasn't yet, but there is hope. Puppy, by the way loves the tree. One more big water dish to drink from, and everybody knows that tree water is better than regular water, Right?

Have a happy Monday!

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